Tuesday, April 29, 2008

do i smell or something?

Seriously. My name was put forward for a tour today, I emailed the TM, left the house (to do some jailhouse knitting) and by the time I came home, the gig was gone. Why is the universe being so cruel to me??? WHY??? WHY????!!!!?????

Jesus. My karma must be wrecked.

Words: Life is cruel, death is distant

weekend words

Saturday: leaving on a jet plane today

Sunday: clearly alcohol is not my friend

Monday: oh dear, there goes my pig

Friday, April 25, 2008

the portrait of ravenous

I'm on the couch eating shredded cheese straight from the packet. I should've eaten lunch today, but the day just got away from me...

Temping is getting to me... and it's getting me down. I feel like I'm being super productive and for what? Nobody else is -- but maybe they're being smart and stretching this assignment out as long as possible. I'd rather just get her done, you know. So today when three people took a time out to count the same thing I almost lost it. I think it has something to do with the hunger.

Today's words: For the love of kittens, people!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

blip blop blobbity blog

I'm recycling that title from another one of my blogs. Yes, plural. Blogssses.

So, interesting developments... what to make of this one. Dirty Dick Boy found me on that roadie social networking site, asked to befriend me. After much hemming and hawing (and a bit of "What the... Really, REALLY???" at my computer screen), I decided to be adult, or you know, my version of "adult" and I accepted his virtual friendship. So, a leeeetle buzzed last night, I sent him a message -- it was totally prompted by my friend, T, she who knows of his ill deeds, and surprisingly he wrote back right away. He also gave me an unprompted update on his personal life (i.e. that he's single and dodged a dodgy marriage bullet). OK I know, really, that it doesn't mean anything... but the overriding irrational part of me WANTS it to mean something.

When will I grow up? Where will I find the money to pay for years and years of psychotherapy??? These are big questions, people!

Today's words: David Beckham is on Ellen... yum.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

just six words

married men will break your heart

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

not much going on here at all

Seriously. There a few things "in the works" but nothing definite... temping is meh, at least the weather is good.

I've been reading "The Last Lecture" -- the book to Randy Pausch's legacy lecture that's been featured all over the internets and TV of late. Oh dear, it's tragic. This guy is so incredibly talented... and smart... and he has a beautiful, young family and it's really just unfair that he's someone who is dying of cancer. It's just not fair. I was thinking of the list of people I wish would die. When I hear of life's major inequities (like Randy Pausch) I wish like Kate Bush I could make a deal with God but instead I'd offer up better candidates for death. I'm sure my name features on someone's death list too, so I'm not going to feel guilty about this. Nope.

I also won't share my list. Not today.

I did manage to hit the pool for half my regularly scheduled laps today. I was overrun by hormonal teenagers playing a very coy game of monkey in the middle. I just couldn't deal... the aqua-aerobics seniors weren't fazed, but I just couldn't do my laps with kids cutting across my lane... and besides, I wore the old swimsuit -- the one with failing elastic. I cut out early with the promise (to myself) that I would get a good run and bike ride in (one mile downhill, one up on the way home and three good, flat miles to jog). Eh, I didn't. I ate chocolate "croissants" instead.

And then I got a phone call with some gossip. It's gossip, but it kind of confirms a suspicion I've had for a while, so I'm a little in the dumps, but it could be worse. I'm just going to go back to The Last Lecture and stop feeling so silly and selfish for an evening.

Today's words: Despite my best efforts, hope prevails.

Monday, April 21, 2008

what a fake

I've gone all FLT here (facon, lettuce and tomato). Yum. I went on a bike ride yesterday and after a stop at Sloan's (where the BLT looked mighty tasty on the menu) and my newfound commitment to "fitness" I decided to go for the "F" today. It's delish.

In contrast, Real Simple featured a great fake-out recipe for a pain au chocolat in this month's issue... I love their "Fake It" recipes -- they're always easy and almost always just as tasty. So today we break even on the healthy eating front. Actually I'm going to give myself a +1 for the lettuce. Oh yes I did.

Today's words: this mid-month is like a lion.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Baby Surprise Surprise

I just saw this on Flickr and it pretty much made my day. I love.

Today's words: fitness as lifestyle not as hobby

objets complet

I finished my second Gretel last night. I love this hat -- it's comprised of many, many clever cables -- small enough to do without a cable needle! Ysolda Teague is such a talented young designer; I love checking her blog every few months to see if she's posted new patterns. Unfortunately it's a bit too warm to wear my new hat... it's going in for a soak and then being shelved until Autumn.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

got a face for radio

I picked up a copy of the DVD for the tour I did last year.

Good things:
1. They cut out the part at the quick change where I go on and on about how the turn thinks I look like a man and that with false eyelashes I now look like a call-girl
2. They didn't put in any of the footage of me running away from the cameras
3. I made it onto the actual video, but my screen time is less than 30 seconds

Bad things:
1. < 30 sec. of me looking pregnant or just strangely bloated
2. I always end up in the bottom sixth of the credits
3. The stupid Hollywood girls
4. I'm in the extras -- just voice, but I sound like an asshole because I just don't know when to shut up

Strangely this time we didn't have to sign any releases for the video. No biggie. I wish they had given me a free copy... because as with Lays potato chips, I can't just have one. I went to Virgin (boo, hiss... evil corporation) because it was close to where we met for Breakfast Club™ and I ended up buying CDs. Two of them. Two CDs I don't need. I'm really making an effort to go strictly iTunes (even though I have a "thing" about the liner notes... now iTunes gives ebooks with most CD purchases so I can live with that). I try and try to do my bit for the environment, but I'm not going to knock myself because I did do my little bit for the economy today.

Today's words: Allergy season hits with mucho gusto

Friday, April 18, 2008


So, I'm temping on this library project and it's very low key... very repetitive... very mindnumbingly boring. Today, however I learned that one of the women who was working with us didn't just decide that this temp assignment wasn't her bag... she was "let go." Ahem. This isn't the type of job you get canned from. It just isn't. Anyhow, one of the other temps ratted her out for taking a long lunch... but here's the thing, we hadn't done any time keeping yet, so maybe she wasn't going to try to claim that hour lunch as work time?

I left 5 minutes early today and now I'm living in mortal fear of getting the phone call to not come back on Monday. Silly, yes, but even though this job is only providing me lunch money, it's also providing me the latitude to spend a little money without feeling terribly guilty. I need this for the next two weeks. I have a feeling I know who the tattle-tell was, but I'm not positive so I'm not going to kiss any ass... I'll just have to start keeping my own tabs. How pathetic is that?

Today's words: Library exhaustion, spring pollen, sleep scheduled

Thursday, April 17, 2008

ducked-up video

OK, let's see if this works:

day late... thousands of dollars short

My property tax is due on the 30th. Urgh. I wrote the check out back in December and it's just been sitting on the counter, taunting me ever since. The whole tax situation just bums me out.

I meant to post an entry yesterday, but got caught up with knitting on the couch while I waited for Barbara to get here from the Springs. Poor B... she got stuck in traffic. Rush hour traffic. In snow. It took her forever to get here, but it was so worth it. We drank... we ate... it was good times and I wish she could've stayed longer.

OK. So, as I was waiting yesterday, I looked outside and saw a couple of confused ducks:

You have to click the pictures to see the ducks in a larger picture... my camera's zoom capabilities are limited. I have video; if I can figure out how to upload it without having to put it on YouTube, I will do just that.

Anyhow, after a while two more ducks joined in. It was this silly duck snow dance thing for a while. Oh, my life is very boring indeed.

While I was very drunk last night, I was on the receiving end of a drunk-dial call! I was *thisclose* to sending out an email, but I refrained and so to reward myself, I'm going to eat a block of halvah now. Yum.

Thursday's words: I love the big blue bear

Wednesday's words: springtime snow is for the ducks

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

the arbiter of my own demise

Why do I drink coffee at 9PM? I need to be awake in less than 8 hours and then after I'm awake I need to be a semi-functioning person for what, five hours at the library. This is challenging on the best of days... AND I also have a houseguest arriving tomorrow after the library. ARGH!!!

OK. Maybe it's time for the codeine... warm soy milk just doesn't do the trick.

springtime in denver... an exercise in schizophrenia

It's just about a perfect day today -- never you mind the crazy wind whipping up all the chaff and dust of winter -- it's sunny! and something like 80 degrees outside! And yet, they're forecasting snow for tomorrow??


Barbara from NYC is here tomorrow night and I'm trying not to procrastinate with the cleaning, but when I can sit on the balcony with the sun shining on my face, it's so hard to face the scrubbing and chemicals (actually I'm down to the vacuum now... the shiny surfaces have already been buffed).

I managed to clear out five (FIVE!!!) boxes of old clothes from my closet. Now it's sitting in the loft boxed up and waiting to be moved down to the garage... where it will sit until January. I just started my first work of the year and I don't think I'll make enough to warrant making a donation. Yeah, the point of donating is to give to people in need, but I feel pretty needy these days as well so I'm going to sit on my donation until I can get something in return for it. So what, I already know I've got an express ticket to hell.

Today's words: Depression hurts as do rusty nails

Monday, April 14, 2008

more mail joy!

First day temping on a new assignment... first work of the year, actually (although it's just for lunch money). I'm one of a group of five people -- everyone seems nice but I don't see how this work is going to last five weeks. We'll see.

In other news, I got an email from an old colleague today which was lovely! Hagos got me started on yet another social networking site for roadies (it's fabulous and the perfect timewaster when I can tear myself away from Ravelry) and that's how I found old Wedgie. Ahh. Memories.

In real mail news Tracy sent me a Librarian Action Figure in celebration of my temp assignment:And here's me perfecting my "Shhhhh" finger (don't mind the torn-up cuticles... I'm swimming again):I also got a postcard from Scotland! Even though I've got swollen fingers from exercising (see above) I feel very lucky and blessed today.

Words: Houseguest warrant early spring cleaning session

Sunday, April 13, 2008

retail therapy

I love online shopping. Half the time I buy something when I'm in a funk, swiftly forget about it and then I get a pleasant surprise days or sometimes months later. Case in point. I got this beautiful envelope from Sweden today (I've been lazy about checking the mail this week):The outside of the envelope alone was so exciting... so stark with a little letter press print wolf in the corner... and pretty Swedish stamps (all so reminiscent of IKEA, my happy place). Inside was the set of letter press prints I ordered a few weeks ago. I completely forgot about these guys and they're even more beautiful in person than they were online. Camilla also included a thank you, hand-written on the back side of one of her postcards, and an extra postcard for me to use.

I really needed this today.

Today's words: Vietnamese bun, belly joy, Sunday surprise

Friday, April 11, 2008

california dreaming

Well, I got an unofficial, official confirmation that I'm going to Coachella to work for a day. It's going to be a bit of a whirlwind trip, but I'm already really looking forward to this. I hope I'm flying United and I really hope the FAA doesn't shut them down for maintenance on the days I'm flying. I'm a little scared.

I met some lovely ladies last night at the Bobmas celebration. The knitting was fun until the sun set so I had to put away the needles and start Miller Time in earnest. I stayed a good 2 hours longer than I planned, and missed new episodes of CSI and Without a Trace. I'll live... the new season is short and they'll be in repeats shortly.

Today's words: I do not need more yarn*

*there are big sales on at a few local stores... one involving donuts, but I'm resisting. It's Spring -- I need to concentrate on some minimizing.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

so... they were mostly right

I think it's still snowing... it was supposed to be over by noon. It's now 13:42. Liars. Well, partial liars...

In with the pink... out with the blue... it'll be sunny soon enough.

Words: Television numbs mind, couch numbs butt.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

sure sign of spring

Even though all the evil weather people are saying it's going to snow tonight (again) I saw the pelicans at the park when I made a stop at T.B. this afternoon. There was also some weirdness going on with some dead fish or some confused ducks or something, but I had to get home to eat my disgusting fast food.

Todays words: Pelicans have returned to the park.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

good fences make

Urgh. Neighbors. Maybe I'm just salty over not being invited to the party the other night... or maybe I've just got a case of the cranks, but when my neighbor put his party night recycling in my bin (in a trash bag no less) I almost lost my shit. Seriously. We all have purple recycling bins. I put mine out once a month, typically, since I just don't generate that much trash (recyclable or otherwise).

A couple of months ago a different neighbor put a bag of dog food in my recycling bin. You can't recycle dog food through Denver Recycling. You CAN recycle it by feeding it to a dog. But I don't want that in my purple bin either. Anyhow, when this whole earth-friendly thing started, we got letters from Waste Management (who run the program) with a list of Do's/Don'ts. We also get a calendar at the beginning of the year with pick-up dates and what can and cannot be put in the purple bin. They're also, at least from that first letter I received, on a 3 strikes, you're out system -- meaning that if you don't follow the rules, after 3 warnings (which they write in white crayon on the outside of your bin so all your neighbors know that you've broken rules) they take your wheelie bin away and you have to then drive to a recycling center on your own dime/time. SOOO, when I saw all of last night's party's remains in my wheelie bin, I almost lost my shit. They don't like for us to put plastic bags in the bins. Plastic bags must be thrown away, apparently. All the cans and bottles were in a big plastic bin liner, but luckily the cardboard boxes that the beer came in was all broken down. How nice.

So neighbor, I know who you are and I'm so disappointed. I've thought about rigging my bin with some sort of boobie trap (like the Mr. Edless -- he can swing out at anyone who opens the lid but that prank only works once) but honestly? I don't have the energy to do this. Why can't my neighbors be more neighborly?

And on that note, I need to write up a letter to paste onto the cluster mailboxes. I know who the offending neighbors are, but I don't want to single them out... because I'm a pussy.

Words so far: Life has rules we must follow

Monday, April 7, 2008

go on... you know you want to touch it

I got a monkey.

His eyes light up and he makes "monkey" sounds.

This was at the pet store -- it's right and so wrong on so many levels. I should've taken a picture of the dog one -- but you can see it on the label. Why would someone buy their dog another dog to rip apart? Weirdness.

Back to the knitting... I bought some Malabrigo to make another hat and I did a cozy for my French Press because I needed a fast and satisfying project. See my kettle? It's SO jealous.

Today's words: Spring is exciting yet sometimes disappointing*

*it snowed today

Sunday, April 6, 2008

sunday rides in the park and other such nonsense

I actually did go for a ride in the park... I was curious to see if there were any baby birds about (didn't see any, doesn't mean they don't exist). I did see a few flying trout -- or whatever those crazy fish are they stock Sloan's Lake with.

I'm really tired today. The weather is changing. I have blue fingernails. I also have an early morning meeting in Boulder. I should try to stay up a little longer and then go to bed. I must get off the computer now to remove blue nail polish.

That's all folks!

Today's words: five year plans tend to disappoint

Saturday, April 5, 2008

before i die

It's the title of a book I just finished... it was devastating. I think I need some crappy, light chic-lit to bring me out of my dark hole.

Today's words: eyes dry after a cathartic cry

Friday, April 4, 2008

today on oprah

Oh dear. It's about puppy mills. I cannot NOT watch, even though I really shouldn't. Please don't get me started on the puppy mill thing... I'll post a photo of my dogs who were stolen back in '88 later (it's assumed they were taken to a puppy mill but we couldn't track them down).

Feck. Oprah is already crying and it's only 1 minute into the broadcast. I'm going to be a mess shortly... fabulous.

when will they stop?

The B-52's are on Ellen today. They're singing a "new" song... don't they know nobody wants to hear the new songs? We love us some "Rock Lobster" and "Quiche Lorraine" but I can't sing along to the new songs because I haven't bought a new B-52's album since the late '80s. Oh well. They get an "A" for effort.

Cindy is skinny again though. Interesting.

I'm gearing up for a pig-out at Benny's. I'm headed to Lor's to check out his new couch, then to pick out some new throw pillows for said couch and hopefully we'll still make happy hour (I think it's going to be obscenely crowded... it IS Friday and today IS Rockie's opening day...) Oh well, it'll be interesting.

My words for the day: Margaritas on a spring day rule.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

the weather is my mood barometer

It's grey again today... and aching to rain, but I don't think there's been any precipitation yet. I keep hearing from people that other people are working loads and it's just putting me in the dumps.

Todays words: Not working is not an option

or: Unemployment is my very sad reality

Wednesday, April 2, 2008


Monkeycup meet Ladybugcup. Play nicely, please.

So I have no reason to own sippy cups but these were so damn cute I couldn't resist. It's the big cracked-out eyes I think. Well if I ever have any visitors of the under-3 set I'm ready to entertain! These might come in handy on warmer days when I need two hands and a straw to drink my poison... thought I'd share.

Words for the day: Early morning calls make me grouchy.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

state of independents

I went to the suburbs to watch a taping for a new show hosted by Matt Pinfield. I came home giddy and frozen from the event and immediately wrote my friend, Dax -- he's the only person I know who actually remembers Mr. Pinfield. Anyhow my laziness is superior to yours so I'm going to paste most of the email contents here:

OHMYGOD! The Pinfield? He the "Mighty?" He's a midget (I would've put it in all caps to emphasize this fact, but that would've been oxymoronic)! That was the highlight of my evening... it even outshone (is that a word?) sitting in the freezing cold studio for three hours and being breathed on by Mr. Death Breath (he who was CERTAIN that Ireland, the Republic -- the one above the "British" one (yeah, I know) -- is on the "British Pound"... and that Northern Ireland is on the "Irish" Euro... he who can't do math and claims to own his own "consulting" company where they speculate on the foreign exchange -- although he called it "buying money and selling money to make money.") and the painfully hip emo kids. One couple was so fucking cute I almost kidnapped them... but then I realized I'd have to buy a really big curio cabinet to display them in. Oh and they'd probably want food eventually, too. I left them where they were... looking SO emotional and blah-blahing on their matching iPhones (probably to each other). There was also a group of typical American blondes who were talking about all these movies they didn't understand, "oh yeah, like, you know, like, when they jump between one day and then it's like the next day? Like, what happened in between?" ARGH!

I also realized that the band I really wanted to check out wasn't very good -- they're so contrived (can I say that? It sounds so shitty and superior, but it's just true) and the band I didn't really care to stay and watch were really good. They're so good that even though they're a local band, I'm going to buy their albums tomorrow. I never buy music from local bands because it's usually crap.

OK. I was there by myself. There was one other guy by himself and I tried to talk to him. I really, really tried. I think he was pretty turned off when I told him to not see REM at Red Rocks this summer because they're well past their prime -- that he should've seen them when he was a sperm in his father's sack. He almost cried then because he's never been to a concert at Red Rocks; so I changed my tune and was like, "oh, well you should definitely go then." He walked away and never came back. It's for the best, really.

*I didn't make it to a record store to buy those albums today... maybe next week when it's more like Spring.

That's all really. So here are my words for the day: Sonic coffee is not very good.